I ordered a beer
but my brand's keg was cashed
so I lowered my standards
and opened a Blatz.
A hot mama walked in
with eyes both so blue.
I wanted to meet her
'til I realized she was you.
And I know what it is
to have the DUI blues,
but I'll risk a dewey
just to get away from you.
I close one eye
to see one road, not two,
cuz I drove home drunk
just to get away from you.
Now there's puke in my beard
and shit on my shoe.
Last night was bad.
I hope yours was too.
I popped my front tire
and smashed up my grill
and I'm still too drunk
to know how to feel.
I got home zig-zagging
on back country routes
and if I didn't cry for you,
it's cuz I was blacked out.
My brain tastes like whiskey.
My soul wreaks of beer.
I'm staying in to drink tonight
cuz I know you won't be here.
I closed one eye
to see one road, not two
cuz I drove home drunk
just to get away from you.
Yes, I drove home drunk
to just to get a long way from you.