Sean’s sole purpose in life is to give AIDS back to the monkeys.
He keeps his jobs about as long as his dad can keep an erection.
There is one career that Sean is looking at right now. He’s been in so many gaping holes that he could work for the geological society as a cave surveyor.
Sean’s not an organ donor, but he says every once and a while he meets a girl he likes so much that he lets her hold onto one of his for a while.
What I admire about Sean is his commitment. You know, he gave a hundred percent at the school he used to go to and the band he used to sing for and the relationships that he used to be in.
Really, though, Sean is a sweet guy. He’s my best friend and he has his qualities. His brother Dustin said that Sean’s dick is one of the biggest he’s ever sucked.
Yeah. Dustin wanted to be here tonight, but he was arrested for impersonating his wife.
Good night, everybody. Drive home safely.